Congratulations! The two of you have decided to celebrate your relationship with a marriage ceremony at our Sunday Liturgy. Dignity/Boston rejoices with you and wants to help in your preparations. Here are guidelines adopted by the Liturgy Committee and Executive Board of Dignity/Boston to help you with your planning. We hope you will find them useful.

Before You Ask

  1. One member of the couple must be an active, dues-paying member of Dignity/Boston for at least six months before approaching the Board and Liturgy Committee (LitCom).
  2. One member of the couple must regularly attend liturgies/home liturgies sponsored by Dignity/Boston.

Timetable Before Ceremony

  1. The couple will approach the Board and LitCom concerning the ceremony six months or more before the ceremony date.
  2. Within the first 3 months, the couple will attend a LitCom meeting to discuss preliminary details; in particular, to discuss presiders. Any co-presiders must be approved by the LitCom and Board by this time.
  3. The couple will meet two more times over the next 3 month period with the presider(s) and one LitCom member.
  4. The couple will meet at least once with the music director and one LitCom member at least two months before ceremony. Unusual requests require 4 months advanced notice.
  5. The couple will attend the Board and LitCom meetings nearest to the ceremony date to discuss final plans.
  6. A notice will be put in the bulletin one month before the ceremony and every week until the ceremony itself.

Liturgy/Ceremony Format

  1. Arrangement for the church to be opened early will be done at one of the previous Board/LitCom meetings.
  2. The altar will be set up as usual by LitCom. Unusual setup (i.e. flowers) will be done by the couple or their designee.
  3. The four rows on the left (when facing altar) will be reserved for family and friends.
  4. Readers & Eucharistic ministers may be selected by the couple. The LitCom should be notified at least one month in advance of selections and is available for training.
  5. Photographer/video will not take pictures of congregation (except for back of heads), and will ask permission of presider(s), readers, choir, Eucharistic ministers, breader, and wine steward at least one month in advance.
  6. The marriage ceremony part of the Liturgy will not exceed 20 minutes in length.
  7. A collection for Dignity/Boston will be taken from all attending.
  8. Any substantial change to standard liturgy format must be approved by the LitCom and Board.

The Reception Downstairs

  1. Any reception other than the regular beverage hour must be arranged by the couple. If this is the case, the couple is responsible for all refreshments. No beverages will be provided.
  2. The couple is responsible for setup, operation, cleanup, and lockup of reception. This includes arranging in advance to get into the hall early to setup. A returnable $100 security deposit and contractual cleanup/security agreement will be required in advance.
  3. Two people who are not the couple nor members of the ceremonial party will be designated by the couple as the point people in regards to cleaning and locking up. They will make sure that the hall is returned to its clean state and will lock up. They must meet with a board member each of the 2 preceding Sundays to learn lockup procedure. The board member designated to close the evening of the ceremony will not stay late or do any cleanup.
  4. When planning a reception downstairs, take into consideration that it must be open to all of the community.
  5. No alcohol or smoking is allowed.

We hope that these guidelines will enable you to plan a relaxed and joyous celebration.



Dignity/Boston PO Box 170428, Boston, MA 02117 | Tel: 617.421.1915 Email:
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